Oh Spank!

DH got after me last night for being an absent blogger.  I've still been in that Twilight Zone place again this week.  Or maybe a time warp; I get up in the morning, have my coffee, and next thing I know it's three o'clock in the afternoon.  And I haven't been sleeping in either.

I have been busy; hands to work and heart to...... well, my heart has been focused on my daughter and grand daughter.  My grand daughter has her very first birthday next Wednesday.  I've been working on this quilt for her.  At the encouragement of my friends, I'm sending it, even though I don't know if her mother will give it to her.  She is still not speaking to me; she told me that I will never be a part of their lives.  Such anger.  I don't know how to process the anger of another person.  I am waiting, just waiting.  Leaving her alone as she insisted.  And hoping.  I will go to the post office today and send the package out into the Universe.  And wait some more.

With the package I'm sending lots of love.  I miss them both terribly.  I was angry too, for a long while.  Recently that anger just slipped away and has been replaced by feelings of loss, yet hope.  I've felt her presence very strongly lately, even though she's tens of hundreds of miles away.  My daughter and I have always had a strained relationship.  Maybe it's a typical mother/daughter relationship.  I don't know because my relationship with my mother wasn't typical, I don't believe.  With N. it feels like there is this iron clad umbilical cord that she strains against.  I've felt these last months that the cord has to be cut for her sake.  Letting go hurts.

Been doing other things too:

Read this book.  So so fun!  And the recipes! my mouth watered through the entire book.

I found this tutorial and started obsessing about making these little owls.  I dreamt about them all Monday night, so got up Tuesday and started working on them.  They are supposed to be owls, but I think mine look like little woodland varmints of some kind.

In the process of making the owls, I came upon the idea of making crows out of black wool.  So I ran over to the thrift store and found this wool jacket for $4.  Love love love when I get inexpensive ideas.  Plan on spending today making crows; I'll be back with an update and photos this weekend.